Instagram grew as a platform where visually appealing photos were shared. Pictures of a coffee were taken in perfect light, filtered, and edited to become something “artsy”. And this is a trend that grew in popularity until everything posted on social media had to be this “perfect catalog” of a life that is not the reality anymore.
But with the emergence of technology and other digital innovations, this was inevitable. And it can be both a positive and negative thing.
Multiple times has the use of social media been linked to a decrease in our mental health, and low self-esteem, both of which could ultimately lead to depression. But guess what? All of these can negatively affect our relationships. When you, yourself, are struggling and are dealing with an internal conflict, it’s nearly impossible not to project your insecurities onto others. And in most cases, we tend to unload our negative emotions on our significant other.
The information that we consume online can not only worsen our self-image but can also disturb our perception of relationships with others. When seeing those perfect couples with the caption “goals”, we’re prone to dream of experiencing what they are feeling. Social media apps created unrealistic expectations of how our partners should behave, and when they do not comply with this image, we leave.
And that’s not all! Being exposed to couples, especially those celebrity couples that seem to be living their dream life, can also increase our level of jealousy. Interconnected with unmet expectations, jealousy can be a critical factor when deciding whether to pursue or continue a relationship.
But jealousy does not only apply to what we see online. Having access to someone’s social media profile nowadays it’s like having access to their whole lives. What they post, what they like, and even where they are. Snapchat created a map where you can locate your friends, remember? And it can be dangerous as this can only lead to jealousy and insecurities within the relationship, even when the fears are not founded. More often than not, there have been situations where one partner was questioning the other’s intentions after seeing that they liked another person’s photo. Can be considered innocent, right? Well, as harmless as it might appear, this can lead to difficult discussions, whether there is an actual underlying motive or not.
And that’s not all! With the possibility of online communication, it has been proven that, as people, now, we tend to spend less time in person. And romantic relationships are no different. But the worst part is that even when we do spend time together, we might be distracted by our phones. And no one wants our partner to give more attention to a TikTok video than to us, especially after not seeing each other for a while.
But let’s be real (no pun intended) – social media does not bring only bad news to our relationships!
Even though we are susceptible to dreaming of the perfect partner due to what we see online, this has only raised our standards regarding relationships and dating. We no longer accept the behavior that our parents and grandparents did. And we can’t ignore the incredible good it did to people who identify as women, since we all know the physical and verbal abuse they had to endure in the past.
Even more so, social media apps paved the way for longevity in long-distance relationships. No more letters and no more daydreaming of seeing our partner’s face! Now, not only can we continuously communicate even when 10.000km apart. But we can also see each other through video calls. Let’s face it – this was amazing for relationships, even for those who are not long-distance.
And we can’t forget the endless possibilities of meeting people online through social media. And we’re not even talking about dating apps. Do you even imagine how easy it is to slide into someone’s DM nowadays? Even when you don’t know each other. I know someone who met her now-husband through TikTok after he commented on her video. It’s that simple!
And when it comes to discussing with random people online, social media also allows us to hear other people’s stories. And for most of us, this can either break or strengthen the relationship as we become aware of what we want in a relationship and what works for us.
That’s true – social media can positively and negatively affect our relationships. But it’s our responsibility to manage our relationships around social media because, whether we want it or not, this is our normal now.
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